Are we afraid of being happy?


Credits: DivineMethod Photography

Have you ever experienced something so fulfilling yet had an underlying thought of being afraid of being too happy assuming that something extremely disappointing will follow? I think we’ve all been there, haven't we? Isn’t it strange that we stop ourselves from getting too excited or try to pretend like something doesn’t excite us because of the fear that if we get too happy, we might “jinx” it or cause something miserable to happen? By doing this, we’re telling ourselves that we don't deserve to be happy or deserve to experience happiness without the permission of someone else.


Why have we become such pessimists? Whatever happened to finding happiness in simple pleasures and being in a state of happiness without a specific reason? I know I’ve been there before. Most people who know me say they like how positive I am. But that also turns some people off. It makes people wonder why I try to be positive most of the time or try to be in a cheerful mood. Its annoying when someone just seems to be happy regardless of what their life might seem like doesn't it? lol. I know my reason behind choosing to be happy - It's because I know what it's like to be the opposite; in complete pessimism and constantly feeling unhappy.


I know what it's like to celebrate success, only to be told that I shouldn’t get too excited. When your reasons to celebrate your success gets dismissed or neglected, you start convincing yourself that maybe others are right; maybe you don’t deserve to be happy. But if you pay more attention to the reasoning behind why they act dismissive, you will realize that it comes from a place of self-lack or resentment that stems from their inability to experience happiness like you do. So why let someone else's bitterness stop you from experiencing happiness that you deserve? Hence why it's important to take external opinions lightly, develop a sense of confidence in yourself and learn to celebrate your own success and happiness regardless of how others react to it.



To be more detailed, an example that comes to mind is my experience with Palm Roots. I know the assumption is that I get a lot of attention and accolades every year after my event. And yes, that does happen. But here’s another side to it. I remember quite vividly for two years in a row, when Palm Roots did extremely well, at least one person who attended Palm Roots left the event reminding me that I was focusing on the wrong things and spending too much time focusing on charity work instead of taking care of my life. I'm sure you can imagine how that felt. After months of hard work and numerous hours spent on organizing the event with the intention of supporting our community, hearing a comment like that at the end of the night can be extremely disappointing. And these comments came from those who complain that our generation doesn’t care about helping people from our community or focus on giving back. Ironic, isn’t it?


Let this be a reminder that you deserve to be happy. You deserve to have what makes you the happiest without worrying about a disappointment that might follow. You are allowed to celebrate your life regardless of if it looks perfect or imperfect to someone else. And learn to cheer other people on when they achieve something as well. Your time will come. There's an abundance of success, fortune and happiness in the world for everyone to have.


Take some time to do something that makes you the happiest. You don't have to wait to achieve something that receives public recognition to celebrate your life. You have every right to live in the moment and be happy for what life is today - not for what it could be or what it should be. People will always find a reason to criticize what you’re doing. So never let anyone else’s bitterness ruin your happiness. Give yourself the permission to be happy. Smile! Your life is worth celebrating for what it is.